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I saw Underworld last night. I'm sorry, [livejournal.com profile] donna_c_punk, I did not like it. Okay. I did, in a 'laughing at you kinda way.'




It was cheesy, a big hunk of cheese with blue veins matching the color scheme of the whole film. Doors get slammed open, which is really weird considering they were often massive oak doors that could get dented from all that. Selene tries to look serious and tough, but ma'am, a trenchcoat and a corset is not what you wear to a gunfight.

Why the hell did they cast a guy who looks like the lead singer from Creed as the descendent of the long-lost bloodline from which vampires and werewolves are both descended from? I almost expect one shot when he has his arms stretched in a Jesus pose, with wind blowing his sandy locks.

Dialogue was worst than your average LARP. And really, if it was a LARP, they would not be sitting on their buns in corsets and lounge lizard outfits. They would be enmeshed in dark centuries old plots, plotting to kill Kraven, the head lounge lizard, or controlling the local music scene, local politics, or an ISP.

Elders? A vampire/werewolf hybrid that's more powerful than both? You know, I thought White Wolf had a tissue thin case, but after seeing it, I hope they get a tidy settlement.

How come everyone's skin tone is so blue? It's either white-blue or blue-black. Very strange.

Kraven and Lucien in the car: Reminds me of Bush and Osama. "Without me, you would be nothing!"

I wonder if there's any fic and how many of it is bad-ass Mary Sues or slash.

The centuries old vampire brings a sword to gunfight. Yeah.
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