Yes, in response to a post
Jul. 22nd, 2006 04:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
taratemimaThing is, I do not want to embarrassed either of them. I only know the situation from what a few people wrote.
At the same time, I think they both need to hear it. He asked for people to write to her about how college is important. I think what she really needs to know what you can get from college that will help her in the long run, and how it can help her deal with the present issue.
I did learn some important things in college.
First, love research. You will need it, even if you never plan to be a academe. A musician looking for places to play, a writer looking for places to publish, and someone starting their own business will need to look up things.
It is possible to get a job without college, but it is increasingly harder. I worked during college, and that got me first to know what my future plans are, and how to work on balance (I did not become a master at it, but I tried). I know that one thing my reasonably bright friends without college degree but substantial work experience face is HR uses degrees as shorthand for 'can finish tasks and knows their stuff'. Also, knowing things can cure decision paralysis.
I learned to consider my audience when writing--give them the information they want, know what I need to explain. This also goes for speaking, uh, if you are worried that someone you care about is delaying too much on something important.
I learned to consider the sources. If someone tells you that you are wrong, they are not out to get you. Not always. At the same time, it does matter how you tell people. I'm still in the process of 1) trying to seperate the delivery from message, 2) being mindful of how I deliver the message, and 3) knowing what messages your elders delivered that are useful and not useful.
I had to deal with some of the adults in my life trying to 'help' and that involved a lot of screaming. I 'dealed' with it but dragging my feet even more. It is not right, and it is not helpful, and I am learning to just tell what is holding me back, finding out how to help with that, stating what kind of help I need, and being prepared.
If you wonder how you are going to get there, be OK with the idea that you may not take straight paths. I transferred to NU from UMass Boston, which meant I graduated after seven years. This has happened to other people. A few of them changed their majors. Not a big deal.
I failed some classes. Pain in the ass, and I know where I messed up in some cases (when I go to graduate school, I will attend every class barring contagious illness). I took them over, and worked on passing them. I'd like good grades. Your parents probably would like you to get good grades. However, I'll point out that what helped me most is knowing my part in the poor grade, and figuring out what I can do to change it. I'm very hard on myself, but I also know how I learn best. Consider finding study skills and note-taking resources in and out of college.
(And when I go to grad school, I will swallow my pride and demand a note taker. I can take good notes--when I see where the information fits in the larger scheme and when I pay attention. The first part is easier to do than the second part.)
Above all--learning never ends. For someone aware of how little of the skills I need and how much work I need to do, that is a scary but necessary thought.
At the same time, I think they both need to hear it. He asked for people to write to her about how college is important. I think what she really needs to know what you can get from college that will help her in the long run, and how it can help her deal with the present issue.
I did learn some important things in college.
First, love research. You will need it, even if you never plan to be a academe. A musician looking for places to play, a writer looking for places to publish, and someone starting their own business will need to look up things.
It is possible to get a job without college, but it is increasingly harder. I worked during college, and that got me first to know what my future plans are, and how to work on balance (I did not become a master at it, but I tried). I know that one thing my reasonably bright friends without college degree but substantial work experience face is HR uses degrees as shorthand for 'can finish tasks and knows their stuff'. Also, knowing things can cure decision paralysis.
I learned to consider my audience when writing--give them the information they want, know what I need to explain. This also goes for speaking, uh, if you are worried that someone you care about is delaying too much on something important.
I learned to consider the sources. If someone tells you that you are wrong, they are not out to get you. Not always. At the same time, it does matter how you tell people. I'm still in the process of 1) trying to seperate the delivery from message, 2) being mindful of how I deliver the message, and 3) knowing what messages your elders delivered that are useful and not useful.
I had to deal with some of the adults in my life trying to 'help' and that involved a lot of screaming. I 'dealed' with it but dragging my feet even more. It is not right, and it is not helpful, and I am learning to just tell what is holding me back, finding out how to help with that, stating what kind of help I need, and being prepared.
If you wonder how you are going to get there, be OK with the idea that you may not take straight paths. I transferred to NU from UMass Boston, which meant I graduated after seven years. This has happened to other people. A few of them changed their majors. Not a big deal.
I failed some classes. Pain in the ass, and I know where I messed up in some cases (when I go to graduate school, I will attend every class barring contagious illness). I took them over, and worked on passing them. I'd like good grades. Your parents probably would like you to get good grades. However, I'll point out that what helped me most is knowing my part in the poor grade, and figuring out what I can do to change it. I'm very hard on myself, but I also know how I learn best. Consider finding study skills and note-taking resources in and out of college.
(And when I go to grad school, I will swallow my pride and demand a note taker. I can take good notes--when I see where the information fits in the larger scheme and when I pay attention. The first part is easier to do than the second part.)
Above all--learning never ends. For someone aware of how little of the skills I need and how much work I need to do, that is a scary but necessary thought.
